Horsetooth Half: The Finish Line

It's almost been a week since I ran the Horsetooth Half.  I meant to blog that afternoon, but after icing my knee, and laying down for a short nap, it just didn't happened.  And then the week happened, so I never got it done.  Today we ran the first 10k in the Endurance Race Series, and I was going to blog about that, but I need to write about the Horsetooth Half first! 

The morning of the Horsetooth Half was beautiful!  Almost too beautiful!  The day before was cold, wet, rainy and snowing.  Tom had run the Running With Scissors Half Marathon at Adams County Fairgrounds in Brighton that morning as well (we had to get up at 3am to get there).  Tom took 2nd overall in the Half Marathon.  Anyway, there was no snow in sight for today, not like the last three years, so this was nice.  At the start line I got see some of my Skirt Sport Sisters (Crisann and Stacey), as well as my trainer, Joey.  Was I excited? Nervous?  Not so much.  I was just ready to get it done.  I needed to get it done.

So, it was time!  Off we all went, all 1600 of us runners.  I was near the back, which was where I stayed for the duration of the race.  I hadn't taken any anti-inflammatories that morning or the night before because the make me so groggy.  But, both of my knees were taped and I had my MCL brace on my right leg, and my support band on my left leg.  I chugged up the first hill, crossed the dam, and chugged up the Monster Hill.  At the top of the Monster Hill I realized that I had gotten up there the fastest that I had since my injury!  I went up that hill smiling, I was running the Horsetooth Half, and today that was what mattered.  Over the next dam, up the Baby Monster Hill.  Doing well.  I had to walk down the steep hill after the Baby Monster, its just too steep for my MCL injury; and I promised my Doctor that I would walk down the hills.  It was very frustrating to see all the people run by me that I had passed on the hills, but today it was just the way it was.  The long road and turn to Bingham Hill is always treacherous (can't explain it, but if you run this course, you know what I mean).  I chugged up Bingham hill, and then Baby Bingham, suddenly I was at Lions Park, about 20 minutes faster then I predicted!  I was pretty happy with my pace, even though it was slow.

The miles after Lions Park (8.5 miles) are what I call the Easy/Hard miles.  Why?  Because you are now done with most of the hills, (except for the two really short, awful hill right before the finish line), and now it's basically a slight down hill route from here to the finish line.  But they are just hard, you have nothing to concentrate on, except for getting to the finish line.  This portion of the route is along the Poudre Trail. I have gotten used to this part of the trail, and it's not as bad as it used to be .  . . . but they are the Easy/Hard miles.  I felt good until about mile 10.5 when my MCL started being somewhat painful; then at mile 11.25 I was getting tired.  I hadn't been able to train enough past this mileage, so it was kind of expected - but I wanted it to be better.  I had to walk a little about every half mile after that.  So frustrating!  Looking back, I don't think I took in enough nutrition, so that might have added to my slower, tired pace - something to note for the next Half.  Maybe go back to Tailwind in my hydration pack, as I was keeping up on my hydration; and it is hydration and nutrition together.

There is an Aide Station at mile 12.2, only ONE more mile to go!  I was ready to be done, but at this point I almost started to cry.  I was going to make it!  I continued to struggle to the Finish Line, and somehow (as usual) got up those two small hills. When the Poudre Trail comes to Linden Street, you take a sharp left-hand turn, and guess what is there!  THE FINISH LINE!  It is about 0.20 miles from you at this point.  I started to run with whatever I had left.  I started to feel kind of weird at that point, can't explain it.  Like I was tired, like I was excited, like I might start crying; just weird, so I slowed down a little.  Then I ran across the finish line.  I was done.  I got my medal, and my pint glass. 

Wow.  It was done.  I did it.  It started with miles of training, then my MCL injury, then to walking, then the fight back to running.  Lots and lots of miles, I think about 155 miles (maybe more) to get to the finish line.  All the struggling, tears, smiles, and miles.  Here I was, at the Finish Line.  I think I won't forget this race for a while.  It was a milestone, but not a regular one, since I have done this race twice before, but a special milestone.  I tried to never give up, but some days it was hard.  I tried to keep my spirits up, but some days it was hard.  Tom never gave up on me, even the times I was ready to give up.  Inside, I never gave up on my goal.  The Finish Line.  However, the Finish Line at the Horsetooth Half is a goal, but a temporary one.  There is always the next goal.  It's good to have another goal on the horizon.  Never Give Up on Your Goals.

Tom and I waited to congratulate other runners/friends that came through the finish line after and before us; then into the food line.  Then, we saw our trainer, Joey again; and saw our neighbor get his trophy for first in his age group.  At that point, it was time to go get our McDonald's coke 😀 Our reward, and we usually talk about our run.  I was frustrated about my time, it was about 17 minutes slower then last year, but about 17 minutes faster then I thought I could do it.  Happy and frustrated, but in the end more happy.

Now to quickly review this race, the Horsetooth Half:  The RD is great, and the race is very well organized.  Started on time.  The packet pick-up the day before was very well organized.  The food at the end is good (but not to my liking, except they had rolls from The Great Harvest Company).  I can't drink beer, so well, I can't have any of the great New Belgium Beer. The RD, Nick is amazing. I can't say enough about him.  He was present everywhere during this race.  I saw him at the beginning, and at the end of the race.  He made all the announcements at the end.  He also organizes lots of training runs (every weekend for 14? weeks before the race.  He wants everyone to succeed.  He provides mini lectures for running on hills, and down hills, and how to keep your body strengthened for this race.  Very impressive.  Would I recommend this race?  YES!  This is the third time I have run it, and I will run it again next year.  It is not a race for a beginner unless to put the miles in to train.  You can do any race, as long as you train for it.  This race gives your the opportunity to train.  The hills are big, and so are the rewards for competition. This is a MUST DO race for all runners.  DO IT! 

Crisann, Stacey and I at start                               Tom, Joey and I at start

Headed to the start line                                               Made the local paper going up Monster Hill

Me at the Finish Line and with my Medal

#MySoxyFeet and icing after

Getting There: The Long Road to the Horsetooth Half

Here it is, 2 days before the Horsetooth Half.  Its finally getting close enough to get anxious about it.  I keep wondering if I will finish, and how long it will take me.  Actually, unless something bad happens, I KNOW I can finish.  I am determined to finish.  I've done the best training I could do with the circumstances that were given to me.  I honestly don't think I could have done much better with the training.  It's been a long slow road to recovery, and I am still 3 - 4 weeks away to 100% recovery.   

So, how did I get to where I am today?  It's been slow.  On March 2nd, I had done a 6.5 mile run from Maxwell to the 3 mile point on the HTH course, and back.  I remember feeling great.  The weekend before we had done 8.5 miles on the HTH with the Running U club, and we were only scheduled to run 7 miles that day.  I felt ahead of my training, and I was happy with it.  The next night, March 3rd, I got shoved down in an ice hockey game and my knees came together and I felt a pop on my right knee.  I know it couldn't be good, so I skated to the bench, and got some ice on my knee and never went back out.  I put a wrap on it, and thought I was going to cry.  Not because of the pain, because I just KNEW, and I started to get angry because I knew this was going to affect my running for a long time.  But, there is no crying in hockey, so I sucked it up until I got home.  I kept icing it and put a compression wrap on it, and kept it up on a pillow, and tried to rest it as much as possible, as well as take lots of ibuprophen.

I was able to get an appointment with an orthopedic doctor, Dr. Servi at The Northern Colorado Orthopedic Center the next Thursday.  During the wait for the appointment, I looked up on line what is might possibly be, which all pointed to an MCL injury.  I was happy to read that most didn't require surgery, so I was hoping I was correct.  I started to do the physical therapy exercises that I found on another orthopedic site.  Mostly, I needed to rehab my Quad, which sounds strange, but I really had trouble picking up my leg and moving forward, so it was the Quad that need rehab.  I worked on strength and mobility.  I also went to the gym.  I wanted to not go to the gym so bad, it was so hard to go that first day, I wanted to cry.  It was horrible, but I refused to sit back and do nothing. I could still use my arms, core, and I had another leg.  At the appointment, a 2nd degree MCL tear was diagnosed.  No need for surgery or an MRI, just ice, anti-inflammatories, ice, rest, and a brace (my "ball and chain').  She also was impressed with my mobility and strength in my leg.  She told me that it was possible to still do the HTH, but in a much slower time.  She also said I need to keep going to the gym, no weighted exercises, no squats or lunges. Also, the brace had to be worn 24/7.  She also told me I could start walking, and as soon as the swelling was under control, I could start running.  I was so thrilled about that.  So, what did I do?  Started walking, that's what.

No, it wasn't easy, both physically and mentally.   That Saturday I walked 2.59 miles, 24:18 miles/min. The next HTH training run was from New Belgium to 5 miles and back.  Of course, there was no way for me to run 10 miles, so I started walking with my friend Stacy.  When Tom got to the 5 mile mark, he texted me, and I turned around.  That day I walked 4.15 miles instead of 10 miles, 19:08 miles/min.  For the next week, I walked every singe day.  I went from  24 mins/mile to 16:42mins/mile that week.

On March 18th, we were to host the first Endurance Race Training run in Longmont, I knew I couldn't run much, so I was a little frustrated because I was supposed to be a host and a runner.  There were 2 other people that showed up that were also injured, so I ended up being able to help them and keep them on track.  The cool thing was that, I actually run a small amount.  Downhill's hurt the most, up hills, not so much.  That day I walk/ran 3.6 miles at a 16:02min/mile pace.  Not bad.  So, I continued.  When there was a group training run, I walked; ran when I could while everyone else ran.  That's how it was.  But I was able to increase my mileage, so I was still getting some distance in, and I was happy about that.  Did it hurt?  Yes.  And when I was done, I had to lay in bed with my knees on a pillow and ice, and ice. That's what I did every day.  Ran or exercised, then iced.  Marche 23rd was my first attempt at the Monster Hill.  The  up hills went well, the down hills were really tough.  But 17:59 miles/min was OK.  The next day my other knee really started bothering me, so I had to start wearing a support on that knee as well.  The Dr. said it was OK, but I am sure it has some damage.  So, I looked like I had two flat tires at this point, which I pretty much did, and still do.

March 26th was a 12 mile training run from New Belgium, I got in 9.21 miles at 13:40m/m.  The last two miles were tough, but I got it done.  I was happy to be there.  After that, I just slowly kept getting faster, some days were good some days were tougher.  I went back to the doctor on April 6th, that morning I ran 7.60 miles at 12:40 m/m.  The appointment went well.  She was again impressed with my mobility and strengthening.  The worst thing has been the pain, especially at night, and that I scuff my right foot, especially when I get tired.  She addressed the pain, and not sleeping with an anti-inflammatory Volteren, and I also asked for the topical, which I had used on my hands during the worst of my Carpal Tunnel.  This helped me tremendously!  I could sleep at night finally, and it mad the running less painful.  I was so grateful.  The problem was that it made me really groggy.  So, when I ran, most days I felt like I was running through a pool of jello. 

On April 13th I did my last hill HTH hill run from Lyons park over Bigham hill to the Lory State Park turn off and back.  It was tough. but I got it done.  The next day was another 6 mile run with the ERS group, the fourth Endurance Race training run I had participated in.  These were all Ambassador lead runs.  My miles/min average between 11:40 - 13:40 m/m, but better all the time, better than they were.

So, here it is, 2 days before the Horsetooth Half.  Worried? Yes.  Excited?  Maybe.  Determined?  Yes.  I will get there.  This may be the hardest Half I have ever done, but I think I am up for the challenge.  I have to be.  It's going to be just one step moving forward at a time, keeping focus on how my knees and the rest of my body is doing.  Walk the down hills, walk when I am tired.  Realize that there are other people on the course that are also injured.  I have done this race twice before.  I will get there.  Just keep moving forward.

Being Injured is a Pain

I guess it has been a while since I have blogged, mostly because the last month has been a tough one, and I really haven't felt like it.  However, I have been running and training for the Horsetooth Half, which is now 4 days away.  This is taper week, and since we aren't running so far, it has given me a little more time to think about writing. 

On March 20th I had to put down Tilly, my 36 year old mare that I have had for 28 years.  She had some kind of neurological episode, and she was having trouble using her hind end, and I could see that she was miserable.  I then arranged for a Veterinarian, who is a hockey team mate to come up and euthanize her.  I also wanted her buried at home, so I had to arrange for a hole to be dug, and then someone to push the dirt back over her when the euthanasia was done.  Everything went well, but it left huge hole in my heart, and I think that it will be a while before I won't be sad about it.  She was with me for a long time, and she was a very special horse.  She gave me three foals, and we went to many shows (Hunter/Jumper, Appaloosa breed shows), and we logged a lot of trails together.  Its been difficult.  Yesterday, Puck, one of her foals, who is 16 years old, colicked for the first time.  Fortunately he is doing better this afternoon, but it has been stressful thinking about losing another horse so soon.

I am also still dealing with my MCL injury.  This has been a long road back to being healthy, and it isn't over yet.  I have tried to keep a smile on my face, especially when going to the gym, but it's been tough.  I am not to do any weight bearing exercises, and any lateral movement exercises; so this really limits what I can do.  I adore my trainer, but I think some days that he forgets that I am injured and that I have limitations.  I have pain, swelling, and most of all frustration.  All I am trying to do is get back to where I was before this happened, and the road is long, tedious, painful, mentally taxing, and frustrating.  Some days going into the gym is really, really hard.  I don't want to go, I feel embarrassed to be such a baby, but then proud when I am able get something done that I didn't think I could do.  There were a few days that I started crying in the gym, talk about embarrassing.  The tears were there and I couldn't stop them.  I felt (and still do) that no one understands how hard it is to be a runner, and an active person with this injury.  Yes, I am so grateful that it was ONLY a tear.  Yes, I am grateful that I could walk and start running.  Yes, I am grateful that it is healing well.  But it has been a struggle, and many days it has been hard to remain positive, and not feel depressed and negative about it.  My trainer one day told me that I should be grateful, and told me a story of someone that lost his foot.  I AM grateful, but some days it is too hard to deal with the pain and frustration, as well as losing Tilly.  I am also in pain EVERY DAY, and worse at night, and I hadn't been getting the sleep I needed. 

Two weeks ago I went to see my orthopedic doctor (Dr. Servi) again, and she was very positive about my progress.  She said that my joint is very stable, and I can take my brace off when I am in the house and doing things that it is unlikely that I will hurt myself.  She said that I am 75 -80% healed!  She was also amazed at my range of motion, as most people don't get it back so quickly, and she attributes it to staying active, going to the gym and walking/running.  She gave me the OK to go ahead and do the Horsetooth Half, as long as I realize that I will need to walk the down hills, and some of the course because I just couldn't get all the training in as needed.  She said that I am much better off then most people, because they tend to sit on the couch and "rest" too much.  I was glad to hear that, and I am proud of myself for working so hard at getting better - pushing through the bad days.  She also gave me a new anti-inflammatory, as I am not taking enough Ibuprofen to  get rid of all the swelling and pain, and not being able to sleep at night.  She gave me Volteren, oral and topical (I requested the topical), and it certainly has helped me a lot.  It makes me really groggy, so I have started this past Monday to just take it at night.  This has helped with the grogginess.  Some days I was so groggy, trying to run felt like running through the ocean fighting the waves.  I think that the Volteren really changed things for me for the positive, and I notice a huge difference in how I felt as far as the pain, swelling, and sleeping is concerned. 

Another frustration is gaining weight.  No, I have no idea how much weight I have gained, nor do I want to know.  That would be way to discouraging to know.  But what I do know is that I have gained weight, and I want to get it off.  I don't think that my eating habits have changed, some days I don't even think I am eating enough calories.  However, the first week after my injury I was told to rest, ice and keep my knee up; which is what I mostly did.  The second week I was told by Dr. Servi that I could definitely start walking, but couldn't run until the swelling was mostly down AND I could keep it down.  So, I did a lot of walking, and going to the gym; but after both of those I had to rest and ice.  I had to ice several times a day, which means that I had to rest several times a day, which meant that times that I would normally be active, I wasn't.   Tom also took over my morning chores, because the possibility of me hurting myself doing them was pretty likely; there fore I also lost that part of my active day.  So, the frustration of gaining weight and losing my endurance is a real frustration and concern.  Maybe if I was a lot younger it wouldn't be so hard to get it back, but I am 55 years old.

Lastly, trying to go through the motions of doing things that you still HAVE to do, even if you are injured.  Going to delivery things for Mom at the Memory Care (several times a week), going to the grocery store, driving, cleaning the litter box, social events, etc; all the while pretending that you feel fine, and it's no big deal.  But it is a big deal, and inside you want to start screaming, and you get tired of telling people what happened to you.  And wearing "real" clothes.  Jeans are just too tight to wear over my brace, and I only have one pair that feel comfortable, which are a new, not washed pair - at some point I will have to wash them, and then they will be too tight on the brace.  So, when it is cold, I wear my winter Xerion running tights, or leggings, which I never wear in public (except for running); or when it is nice, I wear shorts or my #skirtsport skirts.  It hurts to get in and out of the truck, and it is so stiff and sore after driving or sitting.  There just isn't an answer, life goes on, so you have to go with it.  No one is going to do it for you.

I just feel like I have hit a lot of road blocks, but my internal desire is to try and push through it, no matter how hard.  I am better then this injury.  I have had a lot of ups and downs: injury with a 10+ week healing time, weight gain, lose of my beautiful long time friend Tilly, depression, frustration, pain, resting, icing, crying, no sleep, and trying to remain positive.  Just putting one foot in front of the other, every day.

So, now, here it is 4 days before the Horsetooth Half.  How did running go the last 6 weeks that I haven't blogged? Slow is the best answer.  However, I think I will talk about running tomorrow, it's time for bed, and hopefully I will get some good rest tonight.